Where Are YOU?

So Christmas has passed and a new year has arrived. One full of new hope, amid wars,world recession, despair and helplessness. So where is the hope? for one Barack Obama - the new light from USA will be the 44th president - his Inaugural ceremony takes place on January 20, He is not only the the first Black man ever nominated as the Leader of a Major political party in a presidential race in the US but this historical event witnesses the first black person to win a presidential election and to be sworn in as President. If this can happen in my life time ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN!!!

My illness has made itself known for the last few weeks. It brings discomfort, pain, and often a feeling of hopelessness. But also motivates my fighting spirit, my love of life of self of family, loved ones and friends, my wish to understand, contribute, and share in life continually wins out over any negativity. I like to think that this fundamental fight for life is shared by all.

Seana's death has made me question core questions of life and death. I find myself continually asking one of the most fundamental questions. "Where have you gone?"

For this reason I am going to make a concerted effort to understand the Buddhist concept of "The Eternity of life". I will study, and therefore gain an intellectual perception of the subject, but my main aim is to understand it with my heart. I want to feel spiritually at rest with the questions "Where is Seana?" "Where is my youngest daughter?".

When my girls were very young and they were away on a school trip, I would tell them, "listen in the Cold-Drink-Machine's buzz, listen in the wind, look at the sun or the moon, and you will hear me chanting for you and know that I am with you.

I will use the quote below from Writing of Nichiren Daishonin p. 596 as my inspiration:
Nichiren is telling the Lay Nun of Ko that the arrival of her messenger husband on the desolate Sado Island where he was exiled, lifted his spirits. He says;

"Even though I cannot see you. I am certain that your heart is here. If you find that you miss me. Always look at the sun that rises in the morning and the moon that rises in the evening. What ever time, I will be reflected in the sun and moon. And in the next life, let us meet in the pure land of Eagle Peak".

Will I feel Seana when she is reborn or can I feel her now - in the pure land of Eagle Peak and if so how can I?